Nine innings, nine items to get you going. Ladies and gentleman of the Stew, take a sip of morning Juice.
1. Looks like Harold Camping is getting his wish: The Arizona Diamondbacks are in first place for the first time since the 2008 season after beating the Astros 4-2, thanks to a two-run double by Xavier Nady. That makes him XXavier, doesn't it? Hey, Kirk Gibson, what else can you take away from these guys?
2. No amount of offense wasted: It must be nice for the Atlanta Braves to live in a world where a two-run homer by Martin Prado is all of the offense Jair Jurrjens needs to beat the Reds 2-1. Did you know that hitters are 4-for-43 (.093) with runners in scoring position against Jurrjens? Thanks to the Atlanta Journal-Constitution, now you do!
3. Breakdancing catcher: If only catcher Brayan Peña hadn't done an ill-timed Texas Two-Step at home plate, letting Mike Napoli sneak in like a bandit, the Kansas City Royals and Texas Rangers might still be playing. They'd be in the 36th inning. Instead, Rangers win 7-6 in nine.
4. Canadian trampling: The Toronto Blue Jays trounced John Danks and the White Sox 13-4. Along the way, Ozzie Guillen went off on White Sox fans, then said he didn't, but then South Side Sox showed he did — but it wasn't really that bad. You be the judge. Or move on to the next game.
5. Win one, lose one, move on: Justin Verlander threw a career-high 132 pitches in 7 2/3 innings to lead the Detroit Tigers to a 3-0 victory against the Red Sox. The teams split a day/night doubleheader. But, only 132 pitches? I thought Leyland would have abused him more than that by now. And I say "abused" using an elastic definition of the word.
6. Lohse's secret to success:
Kyle Lohse continued pitching like a beast in the Cardinals 4-3 victory against the Rockies, who are playing like they're in mourning. After for Lohse, he says spending what amounted to years on the disabled list has helped him become a better pitcher:
"I kind of got interrupted there a little bit with health issues," Lohse said. "But I learned how to concentrate a little bit harder. Now I'm able to lock it in and keep it there, not let one or two hits get to me."
7. Hella good: In a playoff preview, Tampa's Jeremy Hellickson dominated the Cleveland Indians in a 7-0 victory. And Avril Lavigne curses him, because he's not a Sk8rboi.
8. Claw'd: Clayton Kershaw comes through with a two-hitter (and a game score of 92!) in the Dodgers 8-0 thumping of the Marlins.
9. Cubbie Occurrence: It doesn't happen very often these days, so it behooves us to mention that the Cubs won, 3-2 against the Pirates.
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